A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human,  it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, ” When I get to heaven I will ask Jack”.

The Teacher: What if Jack went to hell?
The Little Girl: Then you ask him.

Teacher: What is the shape of the earth?
Student: I don’t know.

Teacher: well, what kind of Ear rings does your girlfriend wear?
Student: Square ones….

Teacher: No No , I mean the ones she wears on sundays.
student: Round

Teacher: Then ???  What shape is the earth?
Student: Square on weekdays and round on sundays.

Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?

Student: No, he did it all by himself.

Teacher: You missed school yesterday. Didn’t you?

Pupil: Not very much.

A student comes to a young professor’s office.She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly.
“I would do anything to pass this exam.”

She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes.
“I mean..” she whispers, ” I would do ANYTHING!!”

He returns her gaze. “Anything??”

” Yes,.. Anything!” – She says.

His voice turns to a whisper – ” Would you.. study?? “

Teacher gave punishment to one oh his student to  write 5000 times “I Will Not Throw Paper Airplanes In Class.” and told to submit it next day in the class.

On the next day, student submitted the paper written —–

#include <stdio.h>
void main( )

{
int n;
For(n=1 ; n<=5000 ; n++ )
Printf (” I Will Not Throw Paper Airplanes In Class “) ;

Getch( );
}

Be A Programmer…

Think Differently!

Teacher : Listen Students. If I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him..

what virtue would I be showing?

.

Student : “Brotherly love”.

Teacher to Student : Kid, your essay on ” My Dog ” is exactly the same as your brother’s.

Did you copy from him?

Student:  No.  No teacher, it’s about the same dog.

Teacher: Why are you late, Alex ?
Alex: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign ?
.
.
.
.
Alex : The one that says, ” School Ahead, Go Slowly .”

Teacher : Now,  Jessica tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

Jessica: No sir, I don’t have to. My Mom is a good cook.